News for the day...

So the news is there has been no visable spreading that they can see from the CT Scan so my surgery for complete gastric removal will be next Friday the 8th.  There is a slight chance that when they actually get into my abdomen they may see something that has spread, if that is the case then they will leave my stomach in there and close me up.  This however is highly unlikely.  The minimum I will be in the hospital will be 4-7 days.  Believe me I'll be doing my best to get out as quick as possible.  Have my pre-op appt tomorrow, you know, cause it's going to be snowing. 
Thanks for all the good thoughts and love that was sent my way today.  Believe me I could feel it.  I have to admit I was very nervous about my results today and this is the best news we could have received all things considered. 
Love and Kisses to you all,

Barbara

Big Day...

Gotta put on my big girl pants today and go to my doctor appointment(s).  Its a big one folks...I'll keep you posted.

XOXOXO
Barbara

Thanks

Wow, I don’t even know where to begin.  First I would like thank the super extremely hard working group of “white fight shirts”. All the work they did Saturday night was just a smidgen of the work they put into the fund raiser contributing to its being such a success and good time for everyone.   Maureen H, Nancy C, Maureen O, Kelli G ,Colleen B, Kristin C, Judy T, Patty S, Debbie R.  My Mom and my Dad, both of my brother in-laws John H, Jimmy C, and some other sweet husbands and men in my life…Michael O, John B, Brian T.  Also a big thanks to those of you who traveled all night to be there.

The night was so amazing.  I have to admit I was completely pooped about ½ ways through the night but I was determined to stay as long as I could.  I feel bad; I think there were complete tables that I did not get a chance to talk to.  If you were there and we did not touch base I apologize.  Believe me I tried so hard to say thank you and hello to everyone, it just seemed impossible, like people were multiplying.  I really cannot say thank you enough to everyone who donated, made baskets, brought food, secured gift certificates.  It was astonishing. 

Co-workers, Biker “dudes”, friends, 1^st boyfriend evah from 5^th grade, clinical instructors from nursing school, not to mention nursing school classmates, older life long friends, newer friends, family and friends of family, neighbors, neighbors cousins, it’s just nuts.  What a mix of people but it appeared that everyone got along and had a good night. 

Aside from being a little tired yesterday I think I did well physically, even managed to take a walk around the block with my boy yesterday which was long overdue.  Mentally how I’m handling things is a totally different situation.  How many times can I say I’m so lucky, with all the support and love I’ve been receiving its crazy and I think no matter who you are you can’t help but be overwhelmed by it all.  Waiting for results to find out if you cancer has spread of if you can get the surgery you so desperately want.  Again….nuts.

Had to take the little guy for his endoscopy today, of course he was amazing and a trooper the entire time.  Bad news is we have to wait 7-10 days for results.  So now not only are we waiting on my CT Scan results we are waiting for his results as well.  Talk about a family on eggshells.  As soon as I know anything (on either of us) I’ll do my best to blog it.

Again thank you to everyone who had anything to do with Saturday night.  It was a huge success and I’m forever grateful to all who were there and all who made it happen.

Love - Barbara

So I thought...

That once I stopped taking the chemo pills I'd feel better.  Well once again in this "drama" I was wrong.  Still feeling a bit yucky, nausea kicks in quite frequently and not much of an appetite.  But still trying to get fluids in and eat as much as I can.   For those of you playing at home remember NO MEAT today.  Made a tuna casserole, although I already ate meat today.  But I'm trying to get protein in and meat is sometimes the best way for me.  Gaining weight but still very tired all the time.  Even sometimes doing the smallest of things makes me pooped.

So I know that there is a benefit this weekend for me and my family but that is about all I know.  Where to be and the time.  I have to admit I'm a little, maybe even more than a little nervous and anxious.  It's going to be strange to see so many people supporting us, I'm sure it will be emotional.  I wish going into this I had information about my current health "status" but I'm in limbo until my appt next week on the 31st. 

I hope everyone has a nice weekend and I'll try and post again early next week with any new information.
Thank You - Barbara

CT Scans...No more CHEMO!!!

Had my abdominal and chest CT Scan today at MGH.  Thank you Kelli for being my driver and for all of your help today.  Today is also the LAST day I have to take my Chemo Pills.  I'm so excited.  I'm very optimistic that once I stop taking them I'll start feeling better and better each day. 

As I think I mentioned before I will not get my results from today's CT Scans until next Friday.  Basically we need to know if the cancer has spread or not.   If it has not then surgery; if it has spread more chemo.

So I'm going to spend the next few days trying to keep myself busy and catch up on things that need to be addressed.  Thanks again for all the love and support.  I'll keep you all posted as soon as I get any information. 

Barbara

Past week...or so

I have been feeling so much better over the last few days, its almost like I'm a new person.  IV fluids rock!  I still need to be careful of overdoing it, which is very easy to do,  but I'm able to eat and get and keep fluids down so I'm a happy girl right now. 

Had a small boys only bday party (old school at our house) over the weekend for Pauls birthday which is coming up this week.  Could not have gone better.  Love the fact that my son has picked amazing friends with just as amazing parents who are so easy to be around.  I love my small group of Bridgewater friends. 

Little guy is scheduled for his endoscopy for the 28th at Childrens.  Hopefully my Dr. office will not schedule anything for me that day cause I'll have to miss it.  No way am I not going to be there for Pauls procedure.  My CT scans are on the 22nd but my appt with both oncologists and then the surgeon are not until the 31st.  I don't think its unreasonable that I should want to find out faster than a week and a half if my cancer has spread or not jeez.  I may just go nuts and send my oncologist an email or something....to me it just seems like a long time to have to wait.   I just want to get this surgery done for crying out loud, felt I was ready to have it on 12/30.

This week has been up and down as far as how I've been feeling but I get to stop taking my chemo meds next Tuesday so I'm soooo excited that there is a possibility I'll have more good days than yucky days. 

I was very proud of myself for eating a cheeseburger today...first one in months and then remembered an hour later that it is Friday during Lent..dohhhh.  I figure its a good sign at least that I remembered and felt a little bad about it but I'm sure I'll be forgiven for it. 

Hope everyone has a great weekend! 
As always thansks so much for all the well wishes and support, I'm greatful for it, every bit.  
XOXO Barbara

Last infusion...for now

Beginning to see the light at the end of this very first tunnel.  I had my final infusion chemotherapy treatment a week ago today.  Honestly even writing that makes me feel nausea (yup just got sick).  More than usual this time I have not been feeling all that great.  Since last Wednesday I've had to go back to the hospital twice to receive IV fluids, because unfortunately getting fluids in and keeping them in has been quite the challenge this time.  Good news is....I'm hopefully done with infusion chemo for some time; still on daily chemo meds though for the next few weeks).  Bad news is...I managed to loose 10 lbs. in the past week which unfortunately for me is not considered cool anymore :-(  

Some of my newer side-effects that are kicking in....I have the shakes, making it difficult to type; there was definitely something going on with my walking ability, don't know what it is or even how to explain it well.  The stupid issues with the cold are going to drive me insane.   It is getting very painful waiting for the school bus (plus I look a little foolish bundled up like Nanook).

Appointment went pretty well today.  Next on the agenda....CT Scans...follow-up with my "Team" of specialists (that's right I have my own team).  Hopefully after that surgery.  Yeah,  I'm actually looking forward to surgery because I was told today that if it has spread at all then I may have to do more chemo first.  Right now that is the very last thing in the world I want to have to do.   So keep your fingers crossed.

I have one more bracelet to make for week 9 but I promised my son he could make it for me so I hope to get that done this weekend, as soon as I do I'll try and take a picture to post his masterpiece.  We told him today that I was going to have to get surgery, not sure how much it has sunk in.  What prompted us to tell him.  Back in August I dvr'd that show Boston Medical...well since I'm finally catching up on some television watching now I watched an episode today and my surgeon was a featured Dr.   As if I didn't love him already, I do even more after watching the episode.  Plus it didn't hurt that the gentleman who was his patient (with colon cancer) is a Cancer Survivor!!!  Makes you feel good.

I lot of you have told me you use the blog to stay updated and I really appreciate it and I'll try and do a better job of updating it more frequently....but be careful what you wish for..LOL

As always thanks for all the love and support!
There is no possible way in the world I can express how much it means to me!

Barbara